1. If, on a rainy day, you find yourself walking alone alongside a swift-moving swollen river you spy a rope-swing. Don't swing on it.
2. If you are invited to a romantic dinner at someones' house, and he does the polite thing and asks you a few days beforehand if there is anything you don't eat, make sure you tell him that you don't eat seafood.
3. It is not a very good idea to move in with someone you have been seeing for less than eight weeks.
4. If your flatmate is going away for the weekend and you leave your flat after she does, be sure to check that you have your wallet and your keys with you beforehand.
5. Going shopping with a brand new credit card will not repair a bruised ego, no matter how many new clothes you buy.
6. When you go out for dinner with a large group of people (for arguments sake, 20) it is not a good idea to put the total bill on your credit card. And, if you do, and they all give you their share in cash, don't leave the cash in the taxi.
7. If you aren't getting on with a manager, don't drink two bottles of wine and call her.
8. Just because you are slightly inebriated at a work function, this is not an excuse to throw yourself at a workmate because you figure everyone else is also and won't remember. Chances are they won't forget. Ever.
9. It is better to start a new relationship when you have finished the old one.
10. If you only met someone an hour ago, it is better to get their mobile phone number instead of giving them yours.
11. Gambling doesn't make you rich.
12. If you lend money to someone who has a gambling habit, it is fairly safe to assume they won't pay you back.
13. If it sounds too good to be true it probably is.
14. Desperation is not a good enough reason to take the first flat offered to you. (See Number 3 above).
15. It is a good idea not to store your professional business contacts in your personal mobile phone. Because if you go to a music festival, and manage to lose your mobile, someone will find it and send text messages to your entire address book, telling everyone you're coming out of the closet at last.
16. It is unwise to get in to a small red sportscar that can go very very fast with a slightly mad unlicensed irishman driving.
17. Never take the shop assistants word for it.
18. If the shoes don't fit in the store, buying them and taking them home will not make the slightest bit of difference.
19. If you love a particular CD, don't lend it to anyone. Ever.
20. If you think your significant other is lying to you, chances are, they probably are.
21. Don't drink and text.
22. When the 20 year old beauty therapist starts giving you a lecture on the apalling state of your 30-something year old skin, during a much looked forward to visit to a day spa, get up and get dressed and leave without paying.
23. If you are bitching about your boss in an email, don't send your boss the email.
24. Check your zipper is in the up-position before you leave your house. Especially if you are intending to walk some distance, at peak hour, on the same side of the road as the traffic direction in a busy suburb.
25. If you drink strong coffee, drinking it in the afternoon will ensure you have a sleepless night.
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